Amma what will I do when I grow up ?”asked little Velayudhan ,with the most doubtful face he could put on .It was a queer question as his profession had been decided even before he was born .Our family line as far as I could remember have always lived on and by the sea .We bathed in his waters ,lived on his gifts and worshipped him. “Vellu ,you will grow up to like your father.My distinct vagueness was enough to bring a smile of pride and confidence on the boy’s face .His only response of gratitude was a great hug ,before he rushed to the sea to wait for his father and to play along the beach .
The first rays of the day were slowly creping up in their battle against the prevailing stars and the palm leaves illumined in the clashes of the divinities. The birds had all come out from their inland abode. the men had all set away towards the horizon in their catamarans with their nets, and equipments.the children would wake up at any moment .
i proceeded towards our rustic chulha to prepare the breakfast .”Amma!!”,Vellayudhan shouted out for me ..he was upright on the bed ,gasping for breath ,sweating with fear –“What is it Vellu? What did you see ?”,I asked caressing his little head.”Don’t worry ,Vellu I’m here.” “Amma ,I’m afraid .I was throwing stones into the sea when the sea God appeared in front of me.He was angry and slapped me .he said if I threw any more at him he would throw back everything at me.He pulled us all into the water and forced me under one of our boats and ...”
I was amazed at the things he always came up in his mind ,he had always been afraid of the water and the sea though destiny demanded his bonding to the dark waters …
”Vellu ,my son ,the sea is our God and he has always helped us .he has given us a house,little Meenu ,food to eat and even toys to play with .why do you fear him so much .He would never hurt us .If he ever took anything from us it would b e to remind us that everything that we have is his gift and he can take them away whenever he likes .Now ,Vellu ,its late ..Appa has already left ,get up from bed and get ready for breakfast . ”
Little Meera was asleep with the least discomfort. the day would proceed as routine, I believed.Vellu had run way to the sea ,quite early to verify for himself if the sea really was good or bad .
It was a queer thing for Vellu to dream about, I thought .Looking through the holes of our plaited palm leaf walls,I hoped to see Vellu at the beach .He was there playing in the sand with his friends .His happiness near the sea now was a stark contrast to his earlier fear..
Everything was so beautiful,the children ,the deep waters, the sky and all.But there was something missing ..the sea was so still, it seemed dead and deserted, there were no undulations on its surface , no seagulls flying about ,..a smoothness that was frightening –and Oh God ! the horizon was rising ..There was something coming towards us and I knew it wasn’t good .i was frightened ;Fear,desperation and anxiety was all I sensed . leaving all and fetching Meera ,I ran towards Velllu.”Vellu ,come back .Run away from the sea.”I ran towards the water and then along the waters edge towards Vellu .The fear on my face , had only inspired doubt in his mind . He stared back at the sea in amazement and stood anchored to the sand .
I knew I was late .I stopped to gasp for breath ..The sea was rising to heights I had never imagined .it was either Meera or Vellu ,I had to save one. I turned about and ran inlands. .far towards the palm grove I could see Lakshmi with her children. The4 whole dcommunity had emptied out onto the beach. everyone ran ,either away or towards the sea…despperae for life ,of theirs and of their siblings.most of the children had been gathered away from the beach among the groves ,Vellu stood on on the beach ,I was helpless .dear Lord , I pray ,spare my children ..the moment had come..
The mountainous wall of foaming water and black armour collapsed heavily upon the earth .The impulse uprooting everything that sought anchorage upon it .the water hissed and gurgled death and defeat as it engulfed ,lifted and smothered every morsel of life it could grasp.
The impulse of the water was beyond any pain I had ever succumbed to .i feared ,the shock and the impulse had forced the breath out of Meera . I held her close to my breast lest she lose the courage to return back , she was mine and I wasn’t going to part .teh dark water refused to let us feel anything but the little flow of life within us .my senses were locked to my thoughts alone. Velllu had to be saved .The fiery water was descending and the wave had receded. Vellu was struggling for breath and was just a hand stretch away .”Vellu, Amma is here ,come hear ..Veellluu!!”The flow was determined to part us ,I persisted . I could only barely snatch hold of Vellu and support him at the base of the palm leaves. Suddenly the second wave forced itself upon us .my hand still clung toVellu.the water forced me away even before I knew what I had happened. I could just glimpse at Vellu crush against the palm before i was sucked down into the fuming black soggy fluid ,smothered under her weight and opacity .
The golden orb ,the only witness to whom we could complain began to descend in grief and shame. Here lay along the beach sands and the soggy earth ,hundreds deprived of their identity ,their livelihood and their hope to live .The sea had mocked all with death and now , even forced the living to pray for death .We lay partly buried in the debri of our homes and The living scavenged among the dead searching for the slightest hint of their relation or someone familiar who deserved a decent last rite .The land was clueless to where someone had earlier habitated .
As the sun set ,I saw Vellu still held to the palm. The beach was regaining life after the transient passage to the domains of death .the little life that prevailed slowly throbbed into existence within the grounded and injured .As the living rose from among the dead ,I shouted out.”Vellu ,I’m here .somebody ,anybody help him” .No one cared to hear. A little while later , I saw a youth help him down.
Vellu,was alive and I was pleased .Meera cuddled on to my breast as Vellu got up to search for us .”Appa,Amma ,where are you?”..I could see him move over all the bodies that lay ,tears dripping at the sight of all we knew .Men,children ,fishes and debri all lay scattered on the sand ,the stench of death piercing the soul greater than the hope of life.
At nightfall ,when the housed went for shelter and the grieved sought solace ,Vellu went towards the beach with a lighted candle and a heavy heart .The candle light being his only source of light ansd hope. Tears dripped to let the grief flow to its source as he listened to the silence among the dead. The waves sang against the beach ,trying to soothe the grief that it had conceived. the and wrote along the beach sand . my son,who feared the waters and hid from it ws drawn to it as ever before. i was touched ,death had come so close that there was nothing else to fear.I smiled and blessed the living ensemble of my blood and my love for he wrote:
Dear sea , ,you have taken from me everyone I cared for –little meera,amma and Appa. They prayed to you and you took them away with you .let me be worth your love dear father...please take me as your son .Let me learn at your feet.
